Two Minute Movies: Fury


For the second installment of Two Minute Movies, here is the violent, spoiler-filled episode for Brad Pitt’s new war movie Fury. Enjoy.

(Read full review here.)

Wardaddy: “Hey German. Look at my knife!” *STAB*

German: “You stabbed me in my eye!”

Wardaddy: “Let’s get out of here.”

General: “Go hook up with these other tanks and kill more Nazis.”

Wardaddy: “Cool. But I need a new guy.”

General: “Here’s a new guy. He’s been in the army 8 weeks.”

Norman: “I’m Norman. I like to type.”

Wardaddy: “What the…? Ok. Come on kid.”

Norman: “Ok. But I don’t like to kill.”

Wardaddy: “This is war, son.”

Norman: “Not gonna do it.”

Germans: “Attack!”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Wardaddy: “We’re under attack!”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Wardaddy: “Suck on that, Nazis.”

Nazis: “We’re dead.”

Norman: “This sucks. I quit.”

Wardaddy: “You can’t quit. This is war.”

Gordo: “This new guy sucks.”

Grady: “I hate him.”

Shia: “This reminds me of a Bible verse.”

Nazis: “Attack!”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Wardaddy: “We’re under attack!”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Americans: “YAY!”

Shia: “You know, this reminds me of a Bible verse, too.”

Norman: “This killing stuff is kinda cool. I guess.”

Grady: “Sorry I hated you before, kid. You’re ok. I guess.”

Some other General guy: “Go watch these crossroads. If the Nazis get through, we’re all dead.”

Wardaddy: “Cool. I’m on it.”

*BOOM*

Gordo: “Tank’s broke.”

Wardaddy: “That sucks. We’ll fight them anyway. Pretend we’re all dead.”

Shia: “There is a Bible verse about this.”

Nazis: “Look a tank with dead people.”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Nazis: “We’re under attack!”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Nazis: “Ah! I’m dead!”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Gordo: “Ah! I’m dead!”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Nazis: “Ah! I’m dead!”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Grady: “Ah! I’m dead!”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Nazis: “Ah! I’m dead!”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Shia: “Hey. Where’s my head?”

Nazi: “Now ve are Even Stevens. No?”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Wardaddy: “I’m dying, kid. Don’t surrender. It’ll suck.”

Norman: “War is dumb.”

*PEW* *PEW* *PEW*

Nazis: “Ah! I’m dead!”

Norman: “I’m gonna hide under the tank.”

Nazis: “YAY!”

Norman: “Whew.”

The End

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